Need Chapter I
by Esmeralda
Alone, deep inside the Jedi Temple, Qui-Gon Jinn sat - struggling to calm the chaotic barrage of emotions which assailed him. Hoping solitary reflection would ease his inner turmoil, he had taken sanctuary within one of the small meditation chambers in the core of the Temple. However the depth of his anxiety had thwarted his attempts to meditate. In his mind images twisted and turned, over and over; their ceaseless writhing battling against his desperate need for calm.
All his thoughts were centred upon his Bond mate. Something about Obi-Wan troubled him, and yet he couldn't touch upon exactly what. The young man had recovered from the injury sustained on Neider and seemed in good spirits. However, even before today's alarming misadventure, he had been concerned at the unfamiliar air of fragility surrounding his Padawan. Obi-Wan was pale and thin, not so much as after Taogoa, but still - cheekbones were far sharper than they should be in an increasingly thinning face.
Immediately following their return from Neider he had sought, and was granted, a reprieve from their normal duties. Though he had been grateful for the Council's acquiescence to his request, he was still troubled by the concern he had sensed from them.
Bonded Jedi were rare, and a Bond between a Master and a Padawan, though not without precedent, was even rarer. There had never been an example of such a Bond in all Qui-Gon's years as a Jedi.
Padawans were vulnerable. They shone like beacons, bright with the Force, but their abilities were raw, and undisciplined. Their power was a lure to the darkside. A Master needed to be teacher, guide and protector - guarding an apprentice from those who had embraced the darkness and would claim a Padawan before he or she were fully immured to its malevolent call.
He had no such fears for Obi-Wan, but he knew the Council was wary of a Bond which involved a Padawan. They had accepted that Qui- Gon's relationship with Obi-Wan was guided by the Force, but still they doubted the wisdom of pursuing such a path. Bitterly, he recalled that his Padawan's appearance at the Neider debriefing would have done little to allay the Council's concerns. Pale and quiet, bruised shadows beneath dull eyes, Obi-Wan had barely been able to stand upright; and it hadn't taken Jedi abilities to sense their silent rebuke.
He had stood, trying not to reveal his own discomfort, his Padawan's mortification painfully apparent, as the Council had advised them to investigate the true nature of their Bond. He had however, accepted the wisdom of their advice. The mission to Neider had clearly illustrated that their Bond was much more complex than he had anticipated; they would have to unravel its complexities before they could return to their normal duties.
At the start of their hiatus Obi-Wan was under strict instructions to rest. With the young man spending much of his time in their quarters, Qui-Gon had taken the opportunity to try to research the true nature of a Jedi Bond. However, it had proved to be an almost impossible task. There were no other Bonded Jedi living on Coruscant; and even if there had been he was doubtful that he could have brought himself to question them. A Bond was a painfully intimate thing, and highly individualistic. He told himself that any other Jedi, Bonded or not, would have been unlikely to provide any useful insight.
Instead he had spent his days studying ancient texts and records, scanning centuries of Jedi History for any mention of life Bonds - particularly those involving Masters and Padawans; but frustratingly had found only the sketchiest of details.
It was Master Yoda who had advised him to abandon his research. Now, as he sat battling his thoughts, he found himself recalling the encounter - and the alarming event which had followed their discussion.......................
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ (((......He was on the floor of the records room, surrounded by texts, when he paused and looked up, sensing the ancient Master's approach. He coughed as the elderly Jedi struck out at one huge tome with his stick, sending up a cloud of dust
"Not in a book will you find what you seek."
"Master?"
"With the boy you should be." Yoda's wrinkled face creased into a deep frown. "All that is here is dust." The diminutive Master hit the book again to illustrate his point. Qui-Gon waited until the resulting dust cloud had settled before attempting to explain.
"I need to find out more about life Bonds-" He was interrupted by a loud, lengthy sigh, and was forced to relinquish the book he was holding as the elderly Jedi closed it and took it as a seat.
"Learn yes, this you need to do, but nothing can the past teach you." Leaning forwards the Jedi Master fixed him with a penetrating gaze. "A life Bond this is, yes. A 'living' thing it is, only from life can you learn."
Qui-Gon's face expressed his anguished frustration "Master I cannot continue to wander along blindly. I...I have already made too many mistakes-"
"Through mistakes learn you will-"
"Not at the expense of Obi-Wan!" As Yoda's eyes widened he flushed and then paled. "I am sorry Master...I..." His voice trailed off and he bowed his head, ashamed of his outburst. He jumped a little as a small hand gently touched his face, drawing his gaze back up. He was even more surprised to see the tender concern there.
"Love him you do, hmm."
Wordlessly he nodded. Master Yoda smiled.
"Trust in the Force you do yes?"
"Of course-"
"No! There is no 'of course.' Trust it you must. Feel your trust in it. Guide you it will. If you let it." The tiny hand patted his cheek, and he felt bewilderingly like a young Padawan again. "Go, be with the boy."...
Obediently he had nodded, stumbling somewhat awkwardly to his feet he had replaced the books and returned to their quarters. He had found Obi-Wan trying to restore a long dead communicator; the bored youth had needed little persuasion to join him on a walk into the City. He had hoped the light exercise, and a chance to escape the slightly stifling air of the Temple would refresh them both.
They had wandered through the streets in a companionable silence. He was so consumed with his thoughts that it had been some time before it had struck him that his Padawan had been unusually quiet of late. He had tried to draw the young man out in conversation but Obi-Wan had seemed distracted. He had reached for his Bond mate through their link, and had become aware for the first time that something was not quite right. However before he could investigate further something else had summoned his attention.
His gaze had been drawn to a number of work men assembling a huge statue in the centre of the plaza; suddenly alert he had called out a warning just as one of the cables supporting the statue had snapped. It had whipped back with tremendous speed; and as it coiled upwards, it had struck serpent-like towards one of the workmen. Qui-Gon had used the Force to remove the man from danger, everyone else had scattered. The remaining cables had been unable to take the strain and one by one they had given way, sending the statue crashing to the ground. It had split upon impact, the body rocking slowly back and forth while the head had rolled forward - directly toward Obi-Wan.
Horrified Qui-Gon had watched as his Bond mate stood, seemingly unaware of the impending danger. //Obi-Wan!// His cry had gone unheeded and he had sent out a Force wave to push the youth aside, just as the huge stone head came to a stop - directly where the youth had been a heartbeat before.
Even as the people had poured back into the plaza, almost overwhelming him in their gratitude, his attention had been focused upon Obi-Wan. The young man seemed dazed, almost shocked. He had brushed aside further thanks and hurried his Bond mate back to the Temple. Upon their arrival Obi- Wan appeared to have regained his senses, and attempted to dismiss Qui-Gon's concerns - putting down the dangerous lapse of awareness to the 'tedium of enforced rest'. When he had tried to question his Bond mate further, Obi-Wan fell into a sullen silence and, distressingly, when he reached out along their link the youth had raised his shields.
Realising he wasn't going to make any progress haranguing his lover in the hallway. Qui-Gon had led the young man back to their rooms. However once inside Obi-Wan had announced that he was tired and was going to lay down. Torn between his desire to find out what had caused Obi-Wan's alarming lapse of awareness, and his concern for his Bond mate's physical state, Qui-Gon had finally decided to allow the young man to sleep; he could question Obi-Wan at length when the young man was rested, and his own fear had subsided a little. Granting the young man his privacy, he had withdrawn to the meditation rooms...................)))
Now as the shadows lengthened and the long day drew to an end, he was forced to accept that his efforts had failed to bring him any resolution. Maintaining a meditative trance had proven impossible; he simply could not quiet his mind. Surrendering to his growing agitation he stood, slowly stretching limbs stiffened by the day's inactivity. Reining in his unease he gathered his robes around him and left the meditation chamber.
Chapter II
It was growing late as he returned to their quarters, and he walked through the long echoing corridors alone. Their rooms were in darkness, but he could sense Obi-Wan's presence. Qui-Gon found his sleeping lover - still fully clothed - upon their bed; one arm casually thrown across his face. Sitting down beside his Bond mate, he carefully drew back the young man's arm; Obi-Wan never stirred. Reaching over, he stroked away the unruly Padawan braid and dropped a soft kiss on his lover's warm cheek.
Dark gold lashes fluttered open, revealing sleepy gray-green eyes. The young man gave a soft sigh. //Hmm...hello.//
Containing his concerns, he smiled, //Hello// Leaning forward he placed a soft kiss upon his lover's slightly parted lips; as he made to draw back Obi-Wan's arm curled around his neck
//Stay...//
His breath caught as gray-green melted into smoky emerald, pupils widening in arousal. The small part of him which still remembered his worries was silenced, as Obi-Wan pulled him back down, hungrily claiming his mouth in an urgent kiss.
Slick heat and rising desire. The sharp sweet taste of his lover, both achingly familiar, and bewilderingly new. All thought fled, as sensation took hold. Swift, clever fingers divested him of his robe; he gasped as they slipped inside his tunic, stroking over skin afire with need. He surrendered to his Bond mate's demands as the young man pushed him over onto his back. Straddling him, Obi-Wan gave a small sharp-toothed smile of triumph, before sliding down his body - quickly stripping him of his remaining clothing - muttering as frantic fingers struggled with his boots, pushing away his attempts to assist.
As the last piece of stubborn footwear went flying across the room, he found himself pinned beneath a hungry-eyed Obi-Wan - who was in his opinion still wearing far too much. Evidently the young man shared his thoughts. His arousal spiralled as Obi-Wan dropped back to sit between his legs - hastily pulling off tunic, boots and leggings. All of which were carelessly flung aside as the young man pounced.
Finally skin to skin he emitted a moan of pure delight. Dizzily he absorbed the pleasure, Obi-Wan writhing maddeningly against him. As the young man drew back he was unable to stifle a desperate, "Obi-Wan-"
He broke off with a gasp, which became a barely contained whimper, as his Padawan began to explore his body with lips, and tongue, and gently teasing teeth.
Flames danced over his skin, everywhere his lover touched burned. He was almost beyond pleasure. Lips trailed over every inch of his bare skin, a flickering tongue following the same path. Teeth gently grazed a turgid nipple, and he arched up into the warm wet heat of Obi-Wan's mouth as the young man suckled on it, a tongue fluttering around the aureola. This time when the young man drew back he made no attempt to hide his frustration.
Trembling he tried to move, only to be firmly pushed back down onto the bed and held there. Looking up he found himself staring into wild green eyes, before his mouth was taken in a soul-stealing kiss. Released, he lay dazed; only aware that Obi-Wan had moved when he felt strong, careful fingers curl around his erection - just before it was taken into the fiery heat of his lover's mouth.
His mind exploded as Obi-Wan relaxed his throat and swallowed him down to the root. He raced towards release - only to be denied as the young man took his mouth away, applying just enough gentle pressure to curb his imminent need. He almost sobbed. However before he could voice a protest, his lover's soft lips returned, teasing the head of his erection; chasing away his ability to speak. A tongue swirling around and over, flickering against the head.
He watched, transfixed, as Obi-Wan's hand drifted down to take hold of his own erection, stroking it as the youth simultaneously drew him back into the deep maddening heat of his mouth. This time his silent pleas were answered, as the young man continued to suck hungrily; until with a shuddering cry, he came - flooding his Bond mate's mouth with his release. Obi-Wan swallowed it greedily; the youth pulling away just as he spiralled toward his own release, spilling his seed over Qui-Gon.
Qui-Gon was still lost in a haze when his Bond mate moved up to lie beside him - possessively draping an arm and a leg over his recumbent body. After a moment he responded, placing an unsteady arm around his lover's shoulders; his limbs still shaky in the aftermath of orgasm.
He drifted toward sleep, until a slight shiver from the younger man alerted him to the chill of the night air against their rapidly cooling bodies. Gently he tried to extricate himself from his Padawan's embrace - receiving a small sound of protest as Obi-Wan snuggled closer.
"Obi-Wan." His reply was a soft murmur. //Obi-Wan.// This time he received no response. Drawing in a deep breath Qui-Gon rolled them over, eliciting a startled gasp from Obi-Wan - who suddenly found himself pinned beneath Qui-Gon's much larger frame.
Gazing down upon his Bond mate, Qui-Gon felt a flutter of concern as he noted his lover's pallor - twin flushed cheeks providing the only hint of colour in an otherwise pale face. Reaching out through their link, he was relieved when Obi-Wan reciprocated. However as he touched his lover's mind he was unable to dispel a vague sense of 'wrongness.' He was aware that Obi-Wan had sensed his unease when he caught his Padawan frowning up at him. Deciding 'now' was most certainly not the time for this, he shook off his introspection. Lowering his head, he captured the young man's willing mouth, kissing away their shared concern.
When he drew back there was no mistaking the hopeful gleam in dancing gray-green eyes. He shook his head with a soft laugh. "No. A shower and then bed. " The young man raised a speculative eyebrow. "To sleep Obi-Wan, to sleep." Still chuckling softly he moved off the bed. Standing, he reached out and pulled a reluctant Obi-Wan to his feet. Grumbling, the youth followed Qui-Gon as he wandered through to the shower room.
To save time he led them both into the tiny cubicle to shower together. However, faced with a warm wet Obi-Wan, he quickly discovered that his body was not so depleted as he had thought. Certainly parts of him didn't think so. His nipples hardened and his semi-hard erection twitched as the young man brushed up against him; not he felt, entirely accidentally, despite the restrictive space.
"Shall I wash your back?"
Stubbornly ignoring the parts of him which still wanted to sink into sleep, he nodded, "Please, Obi-Wan."
Qui-Gon shivered as his lover moved away, already missing the physical contact. However, Obi-Wan quickly worked the tablet into a rich lather and stepped back. Strong fingers stroked over him, kneading the slippery soap into his back and shoulders. Stiff from time spent sitting upon hard unyielding floors, it was all he could do not to purr under his Padawan's skilful touch.
A hand dipped lower, rubbing the base of his spine. He leaned forward bracing himself against the shower wall. The hand drifted lower still, smoothing over his buttocks in lazy, soapy circles. He trembled slightly as the younger man's erection brushed against his leg. Then the hand stopped, as a wash rag rinsed the soap away. There was a brief pause and then soft lips touched against his back - as slowly the young man began to kiss his way down his spine. Obi-Wan dropped to his knees as the kisses travelled lower. Qui-Gon hissed as gently teasing teeth nibbled across his buttocks, biting and sucking.
A wave of desire washed away the last of his weariness. Turning quickly he reached for his Padawan; pulling the young man to his feet he crushed the youth to him, devouring his lover's lips in a bruising kiss. Obi-Wan responded eagerly, thrusting forward, pushing him backwards into the shower wall as the hot spray pounded over them.
The sweet, heady sensation of soap-slicked skin sliding against him, breathless moans, pleasure-filled whimpers, sudden gasps. His hand slipped down between their bodies gently seizing hot, eager flesh; Obi-Wan cried out into his mouth, then arched back. Emerald green stared into darkest blue, as with maddening slowness Qui-Gon stroked his lover's hardness. Entranced, he watched the interplay of emotions drifting across Obi-Wan's face.
Pupils widened - inky black almost swallowing emerald green, cheeks flushed - the colour flooding downwards, suffusing the young man's chest with a rosy stain. Lips parted - Obi-Wan clung to him. A sharp gasp, then a quickening of breath, as Qui-Gon increased the pressure slightly, speeding up his movements. Without warning he dropped to his knees, taking the youth's erection deep into his throat. Obi-Wan gave a strangled cry and bucked against him, shooting hot salty essence into his mouth. He drank it eagerly, tasting his lover, only releasing him when he had devoured every last drop.
As he stood Obi-Wan stumbled against him. He wrapped his arms around his Bond mate stealing a heated kiss when the young looked up.Obi-Wan smiled dreamily and leaned into his embrace.
//Hmm...love you...//
//I love you too, always.// Placing a tender kiss upon his lover's, Qui- Gon began to wash away the last of the soapy suds.
Assisting his dazed lover out of the shower stall, he dried the young man briskly before giving him a gentle nudge towards the bedroom. He quickly rubbed a towel over himself, then wandered through into their bedchamber. He found Obi-Wan curled up in the bed, already half asleep. Careful not to disturb his Bond mate he slipped under the sheets, smiling when the sleepy youth moved up against him. He pulled his young love close, resting Obi-Wan's warm cheek against his chest. Simple weariness succeeded where all else had failed, muting his concerns and allowing him to drift into sleep.
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7
Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14