Need Chapter XIII - Obi-Wan
by Esmeralda
The amusement left Obi-Wan's face as he watched Qui-Gon head back toward the ship. Had his hands not hurt so wretchedly, he would have punched the ground in frustration. It had been mortifying enough, to have to sit like a child while Qui-Gon had tended to his injuries. To have to sit here now, while his exhausted Master did all the work, was unbearable. He stared despairingly at his bandaged fingers, only grateful that, as yet, Qui-Gon hadn't questioned his failure to use the Force.
Obi-Wan was deeply shaken by his inability to draw the Force to him, something that had only ever occurred before when he had been very sick...He shivered, remembering his desperate attempts to use the Force on Taogoa. Then he had felt disjointed - able to call the Force, but unable to control it. Now, he felt disconnected. He could still sense the Force, but it wouldn't respond to him. His mouth twisted bitterly, perhaps losing the sleeping draft wasn't such a bad thing.
When Obi-Wan had caught sight of his soaked bag, his insides had turned to ice. He had fought to conceal his panic, managing to wait until Qui-Gon had returned to the ship before frantically rifling through its contents; heedless of injured hands or broken glass. However his desperate search had revealed only shattered remains - all three vials had been completely crushed, their precious contents lost.
Of course there was a chance, a very *slim* chance, that the fourth almost empty vial, was still in one piece. It had been in his robe pocket, but since it wasn't there now he assumed it had fallen out inside the ship. However, another possibility struck him as he sat - what if the vial had slipped out when Qui-Gon was carrying the robe? It could be somewhere outside the ship. Spurred into action by the thought, Obi-Wan wasted no time crawling over to his boots, wincing as sharp stones dug into already tender, broken skin. It was a painfully laborious task, to force his swollen feet into the unyielding leather. His bandaged hands were all but useless, and he finally gave up trying to fasten the buckles.
Biting his lip, he stood, a little alarmed at how unsteady he felt. Drawing in a deep breath he set off across the uneven ground, trying to trace the path Qui-Gon had taken. He scoured the ground hungrily, pacing back and forth; until a sudden twinge in his side took him by surprise.
//Obi-Wan?//
Qui-Gon's concerned mental voice called out to him. Obi-Wan sucked in a sharp breath; clutching his side he attempted to raise his shields, to block Qui-Gon's awareness of his pain. They wavered rather alarmingly, and he knew he had only partially succeeded. He tried instead to offer worded reassurance,
//It's nothing. I'm alright.//
He knew he had failed when he still felt Qui-Gon's concern through their link.
//You are not resting.// It wasn't a question, Qui-Gon had slipped through his defences and into his mind. //I told you to *stay* there did I not?!// It was worry, not anger which sharpened Qui-Gon's 'voice'; but in pain, and somewhat panicked Obi-Wan's own temper flared,
//I didn't realise I had to *obey orders* from my lover.//
A lengthy silence met his words, and he almost cried out an apology. The pain in his side was easing slightly when Qui-Gon finally replied.
//Do as you wish Obi-Wan.// The older man's tone seemed saddened, and again Obi-Wan wanted to shout out that he was 'sorry', but again something held him back.
Almost at once he felt Qui-Gon withdraw from his mind; stricken, Obi-Wan sank down into the wet sand. Burying his face in his hands he wept; his tears stinging his seared skin. Obi-Wan welcomed the pain, embracing it as a suitable penance for 'wounding' his Bond mate.
Chapter XIV -Obi-Wan
Obi-Wan had no idea how long he sat there, pouring out his grief to the indifferent landscape. When he finally calmed himself, he felt even worse than before. The sharp pain in his side had returned as a dull ache, his head throbbed, while his eyes felt sore and scratchy. The cold, wet sand had soaked his robe; but though chilled and achy, he was too drained to stand. Hugging his knees he stared out across the bleak gray tephra, trying to will away the pain. Without the Force he couldn't tell what was causing the ache in his side - and fear festered in his mind.
"Obi-Wan."
It was a moment before he realised the gentle words were not inside his head; he looked over his shoulder to find Qui-Gon stood watching him. The older man's face was coolly composed, but Obi-Wan could see the sorrow and anxiety in his Bond mate's dark blue eyes.
"Obi-Wan, I need your assistance with the shelter. If your hands are-"
"They're fine." Obi-Wan lied, quickly scrambling to his feet. Qui-Gon gave him a searching look, but simply nodded, before turning back toward the ship; silently Obi-Wan followed.
He was a little bewildered as to why Qui-Gon had sought his help. The shelter was purpose built, and easy to assemble alone. Still he didn't question the older man's request, grateful to finally have something useful to do, and relieved Qui-Gon seemed willing to overlook his earlier outburst
Working in a slightly awkward silence they set up the shelter; close enough to the ship to benefit from its cover, but not so close as to be crushed by it should it move. When they finished, Obi-Wan sank down onto the canvas floor, stifling a pain-filled moan. He lay back wearily, drawing his arm up over his eyes. "I need to bring out the rest of the supplies..." Qui-Gon's voice tailed off, and Obi-Wan moved his arm. As he looked up, Qui-Gon added softly, ". If you wish, you may stay here?" Still feeling ashamed, Obi-Wan nodded, offering a tremulous smile.
"Thank you."
Qui-Gon returned the smile with a faint one of his own. No sooner had the Jedi Master left, then Obi-Wan released the moan he had been struggling to contain. Rolling over onto his side he pulled his knees up to his chest. The nagging ache in his side was spreading, encompassing his whole torso, and it was growing in intensity - heightened to a hot tortuous pain, tendrils twisting outwards, driving into bone, flesh, and muscle.
Just as suddenly the pain left him. Shivering, Obi-Wan lay - confused and weak. His damp robe felt icy cold against his body; shrugging out of it he curled himself up into an even tighter ball. His eyelids began to drift shut. Obi-Wan fought against his weariness, before finally...reluctantly, surrendering to it. Closing his eyes he offered a silent prayer to whatever gods might be listening, *please don't let me dream...don't let me dream.*
Chapter XV
Qui-Gon assembled their supplies mechanically, his mind only partly focused upon his task. The rest of his thoughts, both conscious and otherwise, were tied up with Obi-Wan. He had felt his Padawan's pain the instant it had struck - just before Obi-Wan had raised his shields against him. However they were hopelessly inadequate, and he had slipped through them easily - his concern overriding all other considerations.
Touching his Bond mate's mind he had found it clouded with fear and pain. Duly alarmed, discovering his Padawan was on his feet and moving around had been enough to tip him toward panic. He knew his anxiety had perhaps made his words harsh, but still he was stunned by Obi-Wan's sudden burst of anger. Surprised, hurt and a little at a loss, he had floundered for a moment.
Qui-Gon knew Obi-Wan wasn't seriously hurt, he had used the Force to check them both for any internal breaks or bleeding. Concluding that Obi-Wan was simply, *typically* pushing himself too hard, too soon, Qui-Gon had reluctantly withdrawn; leaving the young man to his own devices. However his concern for Obi-Wan had been impossible to ignore, and he had left the ship almost immediately.
He had found his Padawan sitting, huddled on a sand bank. The need to reach out and touch his young love had been overwhelming; however it was the sight of Obi-Wan's tear stained face that had almost been his undoing. Only a sense of Obi-Wan's discomfort had held him back.
Mastering control of his own distress he had resisted the urge to drag Obi-Wan into his arms, and had instead managed, quite calmly, to ask for assistance assembling the shelter. His reward had been Obi-Wan's look of grateful relief.
Qui-Gon made one last visit to their sleeping quarters - gathering up their few remaining personal belongings, the blankets, and Obi-Wan's lightsaber - which he found behind the overturned mattress. Prepared for an indefinite stay on Altair they had some supplies, including a water purification unit, for which he was unspeakably grateful. However Altair was a lush, tropical planet - so they had no food, other than the ships emergency rations, and no warm clothing. Jedi had a high tolerance for extremes of heat and cold, and could survive on minimal food and water - but he and Obi-Wan were still only human. Without adequate food and water, they would not last long on this desolate world.
Having secured what he'd salvaged from the ship under a protective canvas, Qui-Gon trudged wearily back to their shelter. The sky had darkened to a threatening charcoal gray, and a cold wind whipped around him. He found Obi-Wan asleep, clad only in his tunic. Frowning he lifted up the young man's robe - it was icy cold, and soaking wet. With a muttered curse he tossed it into a corner. Gathering up the blankets he lay them across the sleeping youth. Then, exiting the shelter, he crossed the sands to retrieve his own robe. Laid upon the bare rock it was cold, and a little damp, but no worse than that. Putting it on, he hurried back. The wind was growing stronger, throwing the coarse grains of sand up into his face. He shielded his eyes as best he could; spitting out the sour grit as it clung to his lips and crept into his mouth.
Back inside he removed his robe and slipped under the blankets,
"Wha...what?"
"Sssh, it's alright Obi-Wan, go to sleep."
Obi-Wan turned over to curl up against him. "Hmm, you're cold."
Qui-Gon attempted to pull away a little, but Obi-Wan hooked a leg over him. "No, don't move...I'll warm you..." Smiling into his Padawan's soft hair, Qui-Gon tightened his hold on the younger man.
"Thank you, my love."
Already asleep again Obi-Wan didn't answer.
Chapter XVI
Qui-Gon awoke, to discover Obi-Wan had all but climbed on top of him. His Padawan lay across his chest, legs tangled with his own, face tucked into the crook of Qui-Gon's arm. Loathe to disturb the sleeping youth, but increasingly aware of the hard ground pressing into his back, Qui-Gon swept his fingers softly across his Padawan's brow.
"Obi-Wan?" The forehead crinkled slightly. "Obi-Wan?"
//Hmm...?//
//Obi-Wan, I need to get up.//
//What...?// A sleepy head rose slightly. "Oh-" Obi-Wan's cheeks flushed pink, as mumbling an apology, he tried to withdraw.
However before the young man could slip off him, Qui-Gon lifted his hands to cup his lover's face - pulling Obi-Wan to him for a *very* thorough kiss. He felt surprise, then pleasure emanate along their link, as Obi-Wan's lips opened beneath his. By mutual need the kiss deepened, Obi-Wan moving rhythmically against him. He felt the young man's burgeoning hardness, and as his own body began to respond, he broke the kiss. Reluctantly recognizing there were more pressing matters at hand. Obi-Wan apparently realised the same, for he relinquished his hold on Qui-Gon with a gentle sigh, but no real protest.
The first thing Qui-Gon realised as he left the collected warmth of Obi-Wan and the blankets, was that the temperature had dropped considerably. Since his robe was still a little damp he wrapped one of the blankets around his shoulders before stepping outside - Obi-Wan following his example.
Outside things looked little different, the wind had dropped, and the sky had resumed its previous watery gray tones- but it was definitely colder. He turned to glance at Obi-Wan, who shivered and clutched his blanket a little tighter. Qui-Gon threw an arm around his Padawan's trembling shoulders, "Come on Obi-Wan, get back inside. I'll see what I can find us for breakfast." He didn't know whether to be relieved or worried when Obi-Wan capitulated without a word; slinking silently back into the shelter. Trying, unsuccessfully, to push aside his concerns, Qui-Gon wandered over to their supplies.
They had several canisters of water, but he wanted to use it sparingly until he was sure the purifier could extract something drinkable from the murky pool; since it seemed to be their only other source. As yet, despite the dampness of the ground, there was no way of knowing when or even *if* it would rain. So he took only one water canister, and a couple of protein bars. Looking at the latter he sighed - Obi- Wan detested emergency rations. After a moments hesitation, he pulled out some candied fruits he had snuck in for the trip, knowing they were the young man's favourites. There weren't many, but hopefully they would help to make the protein bars more palatable.
Obi-Wan's nose wrinkled as Qui-Gon handed over a protein bar.
"Thank you." Qui-Gon almost smiled at the distinct 'lack' of appreciation in his Padawan's voice.
"Hold out your hand."
Obviously puzzled, the young man nonetheless held his hand out obediently. Qui-Gon dropped the candied fruits into it. Obi-Wan's face broke into a wide smile - the first for some time, Qui-Gon realised. A moment later he was grabbed in an almost choking hold.
"Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!..."
Laughing Qui-Gon disengaged himself gently from his Padawan's somewhat enthusiastic embrace, "Alright, alright Obi-Wan."
Obi-Wan drew back a little, still grinning he stared at the sweets in his hand, "You got monda berries!" The young man looked back up, "How did you know I like those?"
Qui-Gon smiled, raising a hand to lightly caress Obi-Wan's cheek, "It's my duty to know my Padawan's needs," He leaned forward and kissed Obi-Wan's lips softly, "And it's my pleasure to learn my Bond mate's." He was surprised, and a little pleased, when Obi-Wan blushed; murmuring another soft 'thank you' The young man looked at the candies thoughtfully a moment, before holding them out to Qui- Gon; who raised an eyebrow inquiringly.
Obi-Wan shrugged, "You choose first."
Qui-Gon was about to refuse, when he caught the look in his Padawan's eyes. "Thank you, Obi-Wan."
"You can have the monda berry ones if you like-" The young man added quickly, flushing deeply when Qui-Gon's smile turned even warmer.
"Thank you Obi-Wan, but I think I should prefer the peechae fruit." He was about to take it when he paused, "If that is alright with you?" Qui-Gon smiled at his Padawan's barely concealed relief, and as the young man nodded, he took the peechae candy.
They enjoyed a brief respite as they consumed their somewhat meagre breakfast; taking only a few, careful sips of water. Afterwards they discussed the order of the day. Since the terrain was so flat it would be relatively easy to walk a considerable distance and still keep the ship in view. Qui-Gon planned to map out the widest possible circumference around their ship. Hopefully he could discover *something* edible, or at the very least another water source. Obi- Wan's face reflected bitter disappointment when Qui-Gon instructed the young man to remain at camp.
"Someone needs to act as an anchor point, Obi-Wan. Besides I need you to see if you can get anything drinkable out of that pool."
Obi-Wan agreed, with some reluctance; then added hopefully, "I could take a look at the ship's communications array. Perhaps I could rig something up?"
Qui-Gon frowned, "Maybe later. I don't want you going back into the ship while I'm not here."
"But-"
"That *is* an order Padawan."
"Yes Master."
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