And Tonight We Have...
English is not my native language. Please forgive me my mistakes.
Disclaimer: "X-men" and all the characters here belong to Marvel , 20 Century Fox and I intend no infringement, this is a piece of amateur fan fiction, and I make no money of it.
Only the original idea contained within this work is the property of the author. Please do not copy this story to any website or archive without permission of the author.
Disclaimer: "Jerry Springer" and all the characters here belong to himself , the television firm and I intend no infringement, this is a piece of amateur fan fiction, and I make no money of it.
Only the original idea contained within this work is the property of the author. Please do not copy this story to any website or archive without permission of the author.
Disclaimer: "Lara Croft" belong to the creators, the play station firm and I intend no infringement, this is a piece of amateur fan fiction, and I make no money of it.
Disclaimer: "Star Wars" belong to Lucas, 20 Century Fox and I intend no infringement, this is a piece of amateur fan fiction, and I make no money of it.
Only the original idea contained within this work is the property of the author. Please do not copy this story to any website or archive without permission of the author.
Timeline: Set a little after the movie
Universe: Set in the movie universe. Only the movie NOT the book that goes with it! Hints of the
comic universe.
Pairing: Scott/Logan, Xavier/Magneto, others
Summary: Xavier sees that there is only one way to solve his and Magneto's dispute....Go on Jerry Springer...
Rating: G
Category: Silly fic- totally. And a little META-Fic mixed in...
Dedicated to: Jemi as all my Scott/Logan fics are. Without her I never would have written more Scott/Logan.
Thanks to Christina for the Beta.
" Professor, you asked for me," Scott said as he entered Xavier's office.
" Yes, Scott. I have thought a lot of that we do here lately and I have found only one solution," Xavier looked seriously at his favourite student. " We go on Jerry Springer and ends this fight with Magneto once and for all,"
" But Sir...," Scott began to protest.
" No buts Scott. Do as I say,"
" Welcome all. Tonight we have some fine guests. On the right we have Professor Xavier with his legendary X-men of Storm, Rogue, Jean Grey, Logan and Cyclops while on the left we have Magneto and his Brotherhood of Mutants of Toad, Sabretooth and Mystique," Jerry Springer said as he walked around in the studio. " So, Professor Xavier, you called this debate. Why?"
" Magneto and I have been fighting for years. It is time to stop," Xavier said pleasantly and eyed Eric with a kind look.
" Why don't you tell them the real reason we're here?" Jean asked as she indicated the crowd.
" I don't know what you mean," Xavier protested.
" You have got a point Sir. We have been fighting Magneto for more than five years and won every time. Yet still we are to let him live and preferably in freedom. That don't seem logical," Scott agreed with his fiance
" Love never is, Mon Ami," Remy said as he entered the scene.
" What? Who let you in? You aren't in the movie. Besides," Magneto added with a leer. " Didn't you oh so wonderful untouchable girlfriend leave you to die in the Antarctica?"
A brief pain flashed in Remy's eyes but was then gone.
" I got back. Besides I have long since tired of psychopathic killer hands girlfriends. From now on I have aimed my goals higher. Like Goddess high," with that he walked over and kissed Storm on the lips.
" What do you say, Chere? You're a thief and I'm a thief. Let's get out of here and find a bank. Maybe stop in Springer's wardrobe first to see if we can find something useful,"
" I doubt that but let's try," Storm said with a smile and took Remy«s hand.
" Hey, Remy. You're supposed to love me forever and feel oh so guilty over almost everything. You aren't supposed to move on. Ah'm in change of this relationship," Rogue protested hotly.
" Storm, Gambit. You can't leave. You're X-men. The world needs you," Xavier protested.
" Sorry, Mes Amis, but since I joined your little band I have been almost killed countless times, stabbed, tortured and I don't know what else. We're out of here," Remy said and pulled Storm with him.
" Scott! Say something," Xavier demanded.
" What should I say? They are right," Scott admitted but didn't sound sad as his red glaze was fixed on Logan.
" Why don't you tell them the real reason you and I are fighting, Charles?" Magneto asked with a strange gentleness in his voice. All eyes turned to the professor.
" Ok, ok....Eric and I had a fight. He wanted to control everything," Xavier began.
" That is so not true. He wanted to be in change all the time," Eric protested
" Anyway.." Xavier gave Eric a meaningful look " ...our fight grew and well, he formed the Brotherhood and I the X-men,"
" You mean you did this over some stupid love quarrel? You never had a dream?" Scott asked shocked.
" Don't be stupid. Of cause I had a dream. It involves Eric and me, a bedroom and a ton of candles,"
" Ah'm sure Ah don't want to hear this," Rogue quickly said.
" Oh, what do you know? You're just a young girl in clothes which nuns would envy and so helpless that even the "heroines" from the movies of the 40's would seem like Lara Croft," Jean said irritated.
" That's not true," Rogue said, beginning to cry. " Logan, say it's not true,"
" Why should I? In this universe you are like that and in the other you try to kill your lover. I don't care much for either," Logan said disinterested as he looked Scott up and down.
" What? You're supposed to love me. Don't you read fanfic? We're destined to be!" Rogue protested hotly.
" I never cared for fanfic. They destroy what even canon didn't. If saving your life makes us destined to be, do you know how many I'll then be destined to be with? This is so the last time I ever help anyone," Logan growled and continued to check Scott out with his eyes.
" Could we get back to the important thing here? Like ME!" Xavier said sharply.
" Oh, for Heavens safe. Just go to Magneto, apologise, let him do the same and that's that. How hard can it be?" Jean said irritated.
" Wow, Jean. You're so smart. Must be why you're a doctor," Xavier said admiringly as he went to Magneto.
" Nah, they just didn't want Hank in the movie. Blue fur would scare away the children,"
" Well, something had to make up for the lack of any real use of your character," Rogue commented sharply, still mad about what Logan had said.
" What do you mean?" Jean asked, her eyes narrowing.
" Oh, come on. You're a least 33 in the movie. You have to be to be a Doctor, " under her breath she added " and you look the part too,"
" Oh jeah? Well, you look like a 14 year old from Victoria's England," Jean gave back.
" Ha! At least my character did some good," Rogue began.
" Yeah, Logan saved you throughout the entire movie," Scott mumbled. Rogue gave him a dirty look.
" Look, One-Eye at least I did something. What did she do? She's so weak that she evidently don't fly with Storm and you on missions and when she finally comes she levitates Toad and that's all. Then you have to save her and when in the torch she didn't do anything despite the fact that she was the only one able to. Her power lies in her mind after all and Magneto didn't put any holds on that. She could have controlled Sabretooth's mind and made him kill...ok, hurt Magneto or something," Rogue said, a smug on her face.
" Hey! I'm a Doctor. Besides, it's not like it's my fault. I didn't make this damn movie," Jean complained.
" I liked the movie. It gave...possibilities," Scott whispered and smiled at Logan.
" Ok, folks. You can leave. Magneto and I have a...dream to fulfil," Xavier said as he held on to Eric's hand as the other man walked next to his wheelchair.
" Look, I'm sick and tired of you giving orders. I'M the leader now. You go, we stay," Scott said sharply.
" Fine with me. I never liked the X-men anyway. Took up all the space in my mansion," Xavier said as he existed with Magneto.
" I don't see why I'm here," Mystique complained.
" Because you're the blue naked woman who don't say more than five words in the movie but have to be there to make some horny boys watch it?" Rogue suggested sweetly.
" Oh, drop dead. Do you know how cold it was? I used to have a dress," Mystique said as she leaned against Sabretooth.
" Come on lover. Let's leave these losers," Sabretooth said and swept Mystique up in his arms.
" You have nothing to say?" Jerry Springer asked as he could finally get a word into the debate.
" Oh yeah. Logan, we're though!" Sabretooth said and carried Mystique away.
" What was that all about?" Scott asked sharply.
" It was a long time ago," Logan said with a final edge to his words.
" So, girls...don't you want to go with me to the back room?" Toad asked Jean and Rogue.
" You got to be kidding. You're a stupid, slimy frog in any universe; make-up and Star Wars fighting be damned. I had hoped Storm had killed you," Jean said.
" You forget that villains never die in any Marvel universe. Making new ones is too demanding for them," Rogue commented as she eyed the frog man up and down.
" Stupid women," Toad mumbled and left the scene, leaving only Jean, Rogue, Logan and Scott there.
" Ah don't have time for this. Joseph said he had found a way to touch me so Ah'm out of here," Rogue said and left.
" Not like the rest of us didn't see that coming. Magneto can made very small force fields so making one around himself every time he touches Rogue should be obvious and then...volla, they can touch.....besides I don't see the big deal. Remy could touch her," Jean mumbled.
" I thought Joseph was killed," Scott said in bewilderment.
" He was but Marvel always kill off the greatest guys," Logan gave Scott a warm look. " Just see what they did to you. Besides this is Marvel and people do tend to come back from the dead a million times so why not him?"
" True," Scott smiled at him.
" Scott, while we're here there is something I need to tell you," Jean began. " I'm not really Jean. She died long ago. I'm a alien identity from outer space and now I have to go back. Farewell, lover," Jean or whatever said as a bright light surrounded her and lifted her up into the air and away, leaving only Scott and Logan in the studio.
" So, I guess telling her that we have been lovers in any universe for a long time isn't a issue anymore?" Logan asked with a smile as he stood and walked towards Scott.
" I guess not," Scott said with a smile and Logan lifted him up and gathered him in his arms and began to leave the scene.
" I love you, Logan," Scott said gently and lay his head on the other man's shoulder.
" Lov' you too, Slim," Logan bummed as he carried his lover away. " I have this little house in Canada where....." Logan's voice died away and left a shocked Jerry Springer on the now empty scene.
" Well, that's all for tonight. Join us tomorrow where Senator Kelly talks about why he is so hateful, his childhood trauma and what it feels like to be dead," He said and the cameras went out.
" Best show I ever did," Jerry Springer mumbled in his dressing room.
Dear, are you soon finished testing those dumb earthlings? Your dinner is getting cold a voice said in his head and "Jerry" nodded.
Be right there. Intergalactic flight do take a few seconds you know
The End